


Challenging the Doors of Time

by KyluxFicHell



Category: Bohemian Rhapsody (Movie 2018) Actor RPF, Queen (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Established Relationship, First Time, Fluff, M/M, Marriage, Smut, Time Travel AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-26
Updated: 2020-06-20
Packaged: 2021-03-01 22:20:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,335
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23854465
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KyluxFicHell/pseuds/KyluxFicHell
Summary: “This’ll sound crazy,” Joe says quietly, “but what’s the date today? And what year is it?”John’s expression is difficult to read. “6th October 1983.”Joe sinks down onto the sofa before he passes out. “And you and I are married? And we live here together?”“Yes.” The worry has returned to John’s voice as he takes a seat beside his husband. “Joe-““One more question,” Joe interrupts. “How did we meet?”“This isn’t funny anymore, Joe.”“This isn’t a joke, I promise. I...please. Just tell me how we met?”“We did the songs for one of your films,” John says quietly. “Queen, that is. And then you came to one of our concerts in New York...and the rest is history.”ORJoe wakes up in an alternative 1983 to discover that he’s one of the most successful actors in the world...and he’s married to a young John Deacon.
Relationships: John Deacon/Joe Mazzello
Comments: 93
Kudos: 156





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I’m really excited to start work on another Deazzello fic! For those of you who’ve read my previous Deazzello fics, please note this is set in a different universe to This Time I Know It’s For Real. In this AU, Joe met John after the production of BoRhap and they got married. 
> 
> Please do leave a comment if you enjoy it or have a question, or come say hi on tumblr @bohemian-rhapsody-slash

Joe first notices that something isn’t quite right when he wakes up to find his nose buried in a head of curls.

A head of curls that smell _really_ good. 

He rubs his eyes groggily with one hand, noticing that his other arm is wrapped around someone who has their head firmly on his chest. At first he assumes it’s his husband, but then he remembers the curls, and he starts to panic.

There’s a naked man lying in bed next to him, _on top_ of him, and it’s not John.

 _Shit_.

Joe’s eyes dart around the room, and he realises he’s not at home. He’s in somebody else’s room, and there’s a naked man in his arms. 

_Shit shit shit_. 

Joe tries to think back to what he did last night, because there’s no way in hell he would cheat on his husband. No matter how much he had to drink, Joe would never betray John. There’s no one in the world who could make Joe want to be unfaithful to his husband. 

He starts to panic, and tries to move away from the man, but an arm tightens around his waist. 

“Mm, don’t get up yet,” the man says sleepily, and Joe frowns.

He’d know that voice anywhere.

 _What the fuck_.

“John?” Joe asks, attempting to shift his partner onto his back to see his face.

“Yeah?”

Soft eyes gaze up at him from beneath the mop of curls, and his heart skips a beat in response to a warm smile with an adorable tooth-gap.

Joe blinks. He blinks again.

It _is_ John. But not _his_ John.

It’s John about thirty-five years younger than Joe knows him. He’s slim and smooth and thinning grey hair has been replaced by a small perm. He looks just like he did in all the photos and old video footage that Joe used to study to get into character (and _occasionally_ jerk off to). John looks a little younger than Joe, and Joe feels as though his brain is firing all his neurons at once. 

“Joe?” young John questions softly. “Are you okay? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

Joe just stares. He’s dreaming. This _has_ to be a dream.

“Who are you?” Joe blurts out, which is probably a stupid thing to say.

John looks a little confused, but laughs. “I’m John. You’re husband. I’m the one you fucked last night, remember?”

He runs a hand over Joe’s chest, and his soft cock brushes against Joe’s hip.

Joe doesn’t remember. _What the fuck is going on?_

“Why aren’t you old?” is the next question Joe blurts out.

John laughs again. “You’re still hungover, aren’t you? I told you it was a bad idea to do shots with Freddie.”

Shots with Freddie? 

_Shit._

This has to be a dream. 

Joe scrambles to pull himself out of bed, hunting around for what he assumes are his clothes thrown across the floor. Young John watches him with a mixture of amusement and confusion on his face, and as the grogginess lifts from Joe’s mind, he comes to the frightening realisation that this is not a dream. 

He’s fully conscious and whatever’s happening to him right now is _actually_ happening. 

He doesn’t recognise the bedroom they’re in. It’s large and tastefully decorated, with a big plush bed and what looks like a door leading to an en-suite bathroom. There are photos dotted around on the walls and surfaces, and it’s only when Joe is pulling some jeans over his hips that he notices _he’s_ in the photos. 

He picks up one of the photos on the chest of drawers. It looks as though it was taken somewhere hot; there are palm trees in the background and Joe is wearing sunglasses. Right there next to him is a young John Deacon, tucked into his side like he belongs there, and Joe has an arm wrapped round him. It’s an intimate photo, and it’s clear from their body language that they’re a couple. 

Joe glances at the other photos lining the chest of drawers- photos of them at Christmas, on vacation, at parties. The photos look as though they cover a fairly long time period- a decade perhaps, as Joe can see some pictures where they look as though they’re in their mid-twenties. 

“I’m on TV, right?” Joe laughs, although this is so _not_ funny. “This is some kind of practical joke. Gwil and Ben are probably laughing their asses off in some secret room while they watch me through hidden cameras.”

John blinks at him. “Who are Gwil and Ben?”

“You’re a good lookalike, I’ll tell you that. They did their homework.”

“What are you talking about?” John laughs. “God, you really did drink too much last night. Although sometimes I don’t understand your odd jokes.”

Joe rubs his hands over his face. He’s starting to think there’s something else going on here. He takes a step towards the bed so he can examine young John, who gives a nervous laugh. 

The eyes are the same. He has the same facial marks on his left cheek and chin. The same tooth gap in the middle of his top row of teeth. He even smells the same when Joe leans in a little. 

He’s beautiful. 

“We have another hour or so before we need to go,” John says softly, “so there’s still time to shake off the hangover. Exercise is supposed to be a good remedy.”

John pushes himself onto his knees on the mattress so that he’s nearly eye-level with Joe, and wraps his arms around Joe’s neck in an attempt to pull him into a kiss. 

For a moment Joe’s brain goes blank; all he can focus on is John’s warmth and the smell of him and how much he _really_ wants a kiss from him. Joe almost meets him halfway, but guilt immediately washes over him as he thinks of his husband, the _real_ John.

“No,” Joe says quickly, stepping back out of John’s arms. “I can’t...I need to get out of here.”

He can’t bear to look in John’s eyes as he pulls on a t-shirt and heads for the door. He makes his way down the hallway, passing a few different rooms on his way, and takes the stairs two at a time. Whoever’s house this is, it’s really beautiful.

He can hear footsteps behind him on the stairs as he hunts around for a pair of shoes, and then there’s a warm hand on his shoulder.

“Joe,” John says softly. “Where are you going?”

“I need to go home,” Joe sighs, wondering if his keys or wallet are here somewhere. 

“You _are_ home.” John presses his lips gently to Joe’s jaw, and Joe’s skin tingles just like it does with his husband. “Come back to bed.”

It’s such a tempting offer, but Joe can’t. He needs to get home.

Joe tries not to look at the other man as he opens the front door, and as he steps outside his heart freezes.

This is his street. 

This is the street where he lives with John.

Joe runs down the driveway, and turns round to look at the house.

This is _their_ house. 

It’s different on the inside, but seeing it from outside Joe knows- this is the house he lives in. This is the house he lives in with John in Putney. 

“Did I bring my cell phone here with me?” Joe asks frantically as he darts back inside. 

John just looks confused, and a little bit concerned. 

“Or is there a phone I can use?” Joe asks impatiently. 

John looks even more concerned now. 

“Please,” Joe begs. “I need to use a phone.”

John gestures towards what looks like the living room, and Joe brushes past him to reach the phone on the table in the corner of the room. He dials John’s cell number as fast as he can, and bites his lip nervously as the line buzzes.

“Your call cannot be completed as dialled,” a pre-recorded female voice says. 

Joe curses and tries again.

“Your call cannot be completed as dialled.”

“Fuck!” Joe slams the phone down, and runs a hand through his hair. 

John is hovering by the door, looking just a tiny bit frightened. 

“I’m sorry,” Joe says softly. “I’m just...I don’t know what’s going on.”

John pads over quietly, studying Joe carefully. “You’re scaring me a bit, Joe. I’m starting to wonder if Freddie gave you anything other than alcohol last night.”

Joe’s brain is desperately trying to find an explanation for all this. Maybe he did take something last night. Apart from smoking some weed in college, he’s never taken drugs in his life. He doesn’t know any other way to explain what’s happening here, because he’s absolutely certain that the man standing in front of him is a young John Deacon. 

“John,” Joe says softly.

“Yes.” John gives a small smile. 

“John Richard Deacon.”

“That’s me.” John’s smile grows wider. “Although you know Deacon’s just a stage name now. Mazzello is my legal name.”

Okay... _that’s_ interesting. 

Joe swallows. “And you were born on August 19th, 1951?”

“Correct.”

“And you’re the bassist for Queen?”

“Very good.” John’s smile is warm now. 

“And...who am I? When was I born? What do I do?”

John’s smile turns to a frown. 

“Humour me. Please.”

John chuckles and rolls his eyes. “I need to keep an eye on you and Freddie at parties from now on, don’t I? Okay...your name is Joseph Francis Mazzello. You were born on 21st September 1947.”

1947... _Jesus_.

“And you’re an actor. An Oscar-winning actor,” John adds with a hint of pride, gesturing at something sitting on the mantelpiece. 

It’s an Oscar. It’s a fucking _Oscar._

Joe takes a step over to examine it, and he nearly has a heart attack when he sees his name engraved beneath the words _Best Performance by an Actor in a Leading Role._

“Holy shit.” 

The dream theory might be gaining traction again. 

“This’ll sound crazy,” Joe says quietly, “but what’s the date today? And what year is it?”

John’s expression is difficult to read. “6th October 1983.”

Joe sinks down onto the sofa before he passes out. “And you and I are married? And we live here together?”

“Yes.” The worry has returned to John’s voice as he takes a seat beside his husband. “Joe-“

“One more question,” Joe interrupts. “How did we meet?”

“This isn’t funny anymore, Joe.”

“This isn’t a joke, I promise. I...please. Just tell me how we met?”

“We did the songs for one of your films,” John says quietly. “Queen, that is. And then you came to one of our concerts in New York...and the rest is history.”

Joe nods, trying to put all this together in his head. It’s like a puzzle where literally none of the pieces fit together, no matter how hard he tries to bend them and twist them and force them into place. 

“Let me make you some coffee?” John suggests. “And some breakfast. Maybe that will help you feel a bit better. And then later on I can cut off Freddie’s balls if he has indeed drugged you.”

“Okay,” Joe says, because he doesn’t know what else to say. He doesn’t know what else to do.

He’s woken up in some kind of parallel universe. It’s laughable but what the fuck else could be going on here. It’s some kind of Twilight Zone bullshit.

As he watches John disappear in the direction of the kitchen, he can’t help but choke out a sob.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the kind words on the first chapter! Hope you’re enjoying it so far :)

By the time John brings Joe some coffee, Joe feels as though he’s been through every stage in the cycle of grief. 

He’s been through denial, anger, depression, and bargaining. He feels as though he’s _almost_ at acceptance, but that doesn’t stop him from feeling confused as fuck.

It’s only when he’s handed a steaming mug of coffee that Joe notices that John has put on a pair of shorts and an oversized t-shirt, and he feels something in his chest stir.

He tells himself that it’s because he knows this is the closest he can be to his husband right now, and seeing John’s warm smile reminds him of home. It’s eerie, looking at this young version of John- this man who isn’t his husband and yet has all the mannerisms and characteristics of the man Joe loves. 

“How are you feeling?” John asks gently, taking a seat next to Joe and stroking his hair. 

Joe tries not to lean into the touch. 

“I’m okay,” he says. “Just...confused.”

He wonders for a moment if he should tell John everything. He wonders if he should tell him that he belongs nearly four decades in the future with an older version of John Deacon.

But he knows how fucking insane that would sound.

“Confused about what?” John questions. 

“Nothing,” Joe says quietly, taking a sip of coffee. “Just feeling tired. I’ve just got a pounding headache from last night.”

There’s no way he can articulate this to John without sounding crazy. There’s no way he could make John believe him. He bites his nail as he tries to think of who he might be able to contact here, who might possibly be able to help him. 

“You’ll feel better when we get some fresh air,” John says with a smile. “And spending some time in the studio will wake you up.”

Despite feeling a bit hopeless right now, Joe actually perks up at that. 

“The studio?” Joe questions. “As in...we’re going to the studio where you work with _Queen_?”

“You don’t have to come if you’re not feeling up to it,” John says gently. “But I know spending some time with the boys usually helps to energise you.”

“No,” Joe says quickly. “That’d be great. I’d love to go to the studio.”

He may be trapped in an alternative universe, but the thought of seeing Queen in action makes him just a little bit excited. Anyone in their right mind would be an idiot to turn down an opportunity like this. 

Maybe it’ll clear his head and help him figure out what the hell is going on.

*****

When they leave to go to the studio later that morning, John thankfully offers to drive as Joe is still looking a bit peaky. 

The journey over is rather bizarre. The cars lining the streets and the clothes people are wearing are a constant reminder that Joe is not in the world he knows. It brings that sinking feeling back in his stomach, and he keeps glancing at John, still not quite believing what he’s seeing. The car ride is quiet; the radio hums low in the background, and John seems content to leave Joe to his thoughts. 

When they arrive, Joe is a little underwhelmed by what he sees at first. The studio is small and dingy and smells a bit mouldy. Joe had always imagined the studios that Queen worked in as being big and glamorous, but this is nothing like he pictured. 

His thoughts are quickly disrupted when they walk into the control room and are greeted by three men lounging around on comfy looking chairs. 

Joe can barely breathe. 

Two of them he’s met before, although they’re thirty-five years younger than he remembers them. It’s so _surreal_. It reminds him of the first time he met Brian May and Roger Taylor, but the maturity and wisdom of decades in the business isn’t quite there in the two men in front of him.

But it’s the man who jumps out of his seat who makes Joe’s jaw drop. A man Joe has only seen in photos and video footage.

Freddie fucking Mercury is standing in front of him.

“Here he is!” Freddie grins, clapping his hands together excitedly. “You wonderful bastard!”

For a moment Joe assumes that Freddie is referring to John, but then he’s walking towards Joe and wrapping an arm around him. 

“You look a little worse for wear,” Freddie chuckles, “but that’s not surprising considering how much you had to drink last night. I have to say, I’m impressed. I didn’t think you’d rise to the challenge, but you fucking ruined me with those shots, Joe.”

“Never again, Freddie,” John says with mock sternness. “He could barely remember who he was when he woke up this morning.”

“Darling, it’s not my fault that your dear husband can’t say no to a drinking contest.”

“It was pretty fun to watch,” Roger adds. “My favourite part was probably when you both got up to dance on the bar and Joe took his trousers off.”

John giggles. “That _was_ quite funny actually.”

“It _was_ until I had to carry Joe outside because he was nearly unconscious,” Brian says with a raised eyebrow.

Joe can’t quite believe this is happening. Queen are sitting in front of him playfully reminiscing about his drunken antics with Freddie Mercury. 

John kisses Joe’s cheek. “You can sit in the corner and rest while we work if you’re still feeling a bit delicate.”

“I might get some air actually,” Joe says, feeling a bit overwhelmed. “I’ll, um, be back in a minute.”

He heads back out to the front of the studio, breathing the fresh air into his lungs. Every moment he spends here just confuses him more. His heart is pounding from being in the same room as Queen, _all four members of Queen_ , and there are so many thoughts swirling around in his brain right now.

He’s trying to figure out what his next move should be, but he’s got no fucking idea. Apparently he’s woken up in the 80s and he’s married to John Deacon and he fucking parties with _Queen_ -

“Fancy a fag?”

Joe blinks up at Freddie, who’s suddenly appeared beside him and is holding out a packet of cigarettes. 

“I’m fine, thanks.” Joe swallows. 

“You look fucking awful, darling. Everything alright?”

Joe takes a deep breath. “Yeah. I’m just...not myself today.”

Freddie frowns. “You do look like shit. Jesus Christ. John was having a go at me because he thinks I nearly poisoned you and I told him not to be such a mother hen, but I think he may be bloody right.”

“It’s not the alcohol,” Joe says with a forced smile. “There’s some other stuff going on that’s just got me distracted.”

“Ah,” Freddie says knowingly. “The new job.”

“New job?”

“Your new project?” Freddie puts a hand over his mouth at Joe’s blank face. “Whoops, was I not supposed to know? Sorry, darling, John told us about it the other day and I didn’t know it was meant to be a secret. He’s very proud of you, you know. I’m guessing you must be excited but of course dreading being away from our Deaky for so long. And of course our tour is due to kick off just before you finish filming so you won’t have much time together over the next year.”

Joe bites his lip. “Yeah. That’s what’s bothering me.”

“I know it’s an awfully long time for you two lovebirds to be apart, but you’ll be fine. You’ve done it before and you’ll do it again.” Freddie takes a drag of his cigarette. “You know he’s thinking about quitting the band?”

Joe’s eyes widen. “John wants to leave Queen?”

“He’s thinking about it. He hates being away from you all the time, and I can tell he’s getting to the point now where constantly being in the spotlight is very draining for him.”

Joe swallows. Even though this isn’t his world, he couldn’t imagine a world where John leaves Queen like this. Because of him. 

“Whatever he decides to do, we’ll all support him,” Freddie says softly. “And you. We just want him to be happy.”

“That’s what I want too,” Joe says honestly.

Because there’s no world in existence where he wouldn’t want John to be happy. 

*****

When they go back inside, Roger and John are lounging on the sofa in the control booth while Brian messes around on his guitar. 

It still strikes Joe as so surreal, especially when he takes a seat next to John and John immediately snuggles up to him. It reminds him of home; it’s weird to think that he’s so far away from the home he knows. 

He stays quiet while he watches the band work, partly because he’s still a bit in awe of what’s happening, and partly because he doesn’t want to miss this. He gets to see Queen at work, and John at his most happiest. 

It’s incredible.

He wonders if this is what he’s always done. The Joe of this universe, that is. The Joe who’s a giant movie star and has been with John for a decade. He wonders if he’s always come here to the studio to watch him work. He wonders if John ever comes to visit him on set when he’s working on a movie. He wonders if they attend award shows and public functions together; something that Joe’s John has never enjoyed doing.

Whatever his life is like here, he knows he must be happy.

*****

Over the next few days, Joe doesn’t really know what to do with himself. 

He tries ringing his husband’s cell phone number (his _real_ husband’s cell phone number) multiple times but can’t get through. He tries ringing Gwil and Ben but gets the same result. He even tries ringing himself, just in case there’s a crazy chance there’s actually a version of himself out there somewhere who might know what the hell is going on here. 

John seems to be satisfied with the excuse that Joe is acting so odd because he’s still feeling so lousy from the party, but it’s clear that he’s concerned. Joe isn’t sure how the version of himself that lives here would normally behave, but if it’s anything like how _he_ would normally behave, then it’s no wonder John is worried. 

“Maybe we should see a doctor,” John says quietly when they’re eating dinner together on Joe’s third night in this place. “You’ve been so quiet and just...not you.”

Joe is about to protest when he wonders if maybe seeing a doctor would be a good idea. It’s a long shot but maybe he can get his hands on some drugs to wake him up from whatever this is. 

“Yeah,” Joe says. “That might be good actually.”

John gives him a sad smile. “I know this might seem like a strange thing to ask, but I’ve been wanting to ask you this for a while. Are you still happy here? With me?”

Even though this isn’t his John, there’s something in the younger man’s voice that goes straight to Joe’s heart. The vulnerability perhaps. 

“What do you mean?” Joe asks softly.

This may not be his John, but seeing sadness in the eyes of any version of John Deacon will tug at his heartstrings. 

“You’ve been so distant lately, Joe. I know you’ve got a lot going on with the new film and I know how nervous you are about it, but I can’t help but wonder...if this is still what you want. Living here in London when you could be off living some exotic life in LA.”

John’s voice wobbles a bit, and for a moment Joe forgets this isn’t his husband. 

“Hey,” Joe says softly, and he reaches over to take John’s hand in his own. It’s the first real intimacy he’s shown this John, but it just feels like the right thing to do.

“Listen to me, John. I love you, okay? More than anything in the world. There’s nothing I want more than to be here with you. Nothing. Understand?”

Joe has no idea if those would be the same sentiments of his counterpart in this universe, but he can’t bear to see John look so sad. He’s avoided kissing John over the last couple of days as he still can’t help but feel like it’s a betrayal to his own John, but he decides to make an exception here. He leans forward to gently brush his lips against the younger man’s.

It’s surprising how familiar it feels.

“Yeah,” John says when they part, a small smile on his face. 

A smile that makes Joe’s chest feel warm. 

“I love you too, Joe.” John strokes Joe’s jaw gently, and Joe swears he feels his skin tingle. “I know you’re a bit anxious about the new job but I’m here for you. And I’ll take care of you while you’re feeling poorly.”

It almost feels like home. Almost. 

Like the previous two nights, they clear up quietly together before settling down to watch TV, although Joe can’t really concentrate. He allows John to curl up next to him and rest his head on his shoulder, and he wonders what his John would make of all this. What would his John do if he was in this situation?

When they slip into bed together, John cuddles up to Joe and they share a quick goodnight kiss, but luckily he doesn’t seem to be interested in much else. It’s not that Joe wouldn’t be interested in fucking a young John Deacon, but he still can’t help but feel guilty. 

He lies there in the dark, in the bed that’s not his bed with the husband that’s not his husband and wonders what the hell his next move should be. Seeing a doctor seems like a good start, even if they’ll probably think he’s crazy. He’s tried to get in touch with everyone else who could possibly help without any luck-

And then a thought hits him. 

“John.” Joe gently shakes his husband’s arm, trying to keep the excitement from his voice. 

“Mm?” John yawns sleepily.

“Do we have a phone number for my parents?”

John blinks. “Yes. You know we do.”

“Where is it?” Joe scrambles out of bed. 

“In the address book by the phone. Wait, you want to call them now?”

“Yeah, it’s only early evening over there.” Joe pauses. “They still live in New York right?”

“Yes.” The concerned look returns to Joe’s voice. “Why do you need to call them right now?”

But Joe ignores the question, because he’s just had another thought.

His dad is still alive in this universe. 

He’s already running down the stairs before John can call out worriedly to him.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Joe tries to find some answers...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry again for the slightly delayed chapter folks- it may be that I have to update every other week instead of weekly, as things are a bit crazy at the moment! Hope you enjoy :)

Joe’s heart is racing as he fumbles through the phone book on the table, his fingers shaking slightly as he tries to locate the names he’s looking for.

He grins when he sees _Joseph and Virginia Mazzello (Joe’s parents)_ scrawled across the page in John’s handwriting. 

He can barely contain his excitement as he punches in the number and listens to the phone ring on the other end. If there’s anyone who might be able to help him, it would be his parents. He doesn’t know how but they’ve always been able to help him find a solution to any problem, big or small. And he might actually get to speak to his dad again. 

Joe bites his thumbnail as the phone rings, picturing his dad’s face in his mind. 

“Hello?” A familiar female voice. 

It’s so good to hear his mother’s voice. Joe has always felt comforted by his mom’s voice and he feels better already.

“Hi mom,” Joe says with a soft smile. “How are you?”

“Joe? I’m fine, honey, but what are you doing calling me at this hour? It must be late over there in London.”

“I just wanted to hear your voice.” Joe presses his back to the wall and sinks down slowly, imagining his mother’s concerned face. 

“Is everything ok? Is John okay?”

Joe thinks of John upstairs in bed, probably confused and worried. “Yeah, mom, John’s okay. I actually wanted to talk to you about something real quick. Because right now I feel like I’m going crazy and I don’t belong here.”

“Don’t belong here?” Virginia says softly. “What do you mean?”

“Mom...what year were you born? I know it seems random and sounds a bit crazy but please humour me.”

There’s a pause. 

“1915.”

Okay. So it seems as though she’s the same age as Joe’s mother in his own world, but she was born 36 years earlier in _this_ world. 

“And I was born in 1947?”

“Yes...Joe, honey, what on Earth is going on?”

It’s as if his and his family’s lives have been shifted back a few decades. 

Joe bites his lip, trying not to burst into tears. He doesn’t know why he thought his mother would be _his_ mother; he doesn’t know why he thought she may be different and might be able to help. He guesses that it’s just human nature to think that your mom might be the one person you can rely on in times like this. 

“Can I speak to dad, please?” Joe asks in a shaky voice. 

He’s not sure his dad will be much help either, but he just wants to talk to him. To hear his voice one more time. He wishes they were in a time where iPhones existed so he could actually _see_ his dad, but right now a phone call will do.

There’s some jostling on the other end of the phone, and Joe bites his nails nervously. 

“Joe?”

Joe can feel himself tearing up already at the sound of his father’s voice. 

“Joe? You there?”

“Yeah, I’m here,” Joe chokes out, overcome with emotion. “I’m here, dad. It’s so good to hear your voice.”

A deep chuckle. “We spoke earlier this week. But it’s good to hear your voice too. What’s up, son? Your mom says you sound a bit unwell.”

Joe isn’t sure if it’s just because this moment is so overwhelming, or because he knows his dad would never laugh at him or call him crazy, but he just starts talking about everything that’s happened to him. He knows it’s probably a bad idea, but his dad has always been able to help him with any problem. It sounds preposterous as the words tumble out of his mouth, as he talks about alternate universes and time travel. He talks about his husband nearly forty years away and the life he has there, and how he doesn’t know what the hell is going on and what he should do.

By the time Joe has finished he’s in tears, but his dad’s voice is soothing on the other side of the phone. 

“It’s okay, Joey, it’s alright. Listen to me, breathe with me, that’s it.”

They count to ten together; something Joe’s dad always used to do with him to calm him down. 

“I know it sounds crazy,” Joe says quietly. “But I don’t know what to do.”

“Okay, Joe. It’s okay. I don’t think you’re crazy. I think John’s idea of seeing a doctor is probably a good one. Maybe they can do some blood tests and see if there’s anything unusual. It’s probably best just to check and be on the safe side.”

Joe sniffs and nods. “Yeah.”

“I can’t pretend to have any ideas about what’s happened to you, but seeing a doctor is a good place to start and you might get some answers there. I know you don’t mess around with drugs but maybe they can run some tests and see what might be causing this. And if not, then I’ll fly over and see you and we can talk this over and try and work this out.”

He’s really no closer to answers, but just talking to his dad has reassured him a little. Just knowing that he’s not completely alone here has made him feel a little better.

Joe talks to his dad a little while longer, just in case he wakes up tomorrow back in his regular old life. They talk about the family and baseball and where Joe will spend Thanksgiving this year. 

“It would be great to have you and John over here for the holidays,” his dad says excitedly. “I miss you boys so much. And I know your mom would love to have some help from John in the kitchen. The whole family loves his cooking.”

By the time they say goodbye, Joe is feeling a lot more positive about things. He pads back to bed quietly, not surprised to find John still awake, sitting up reading a book.

“Everything okay?” John asks softly as Joe climbs into bed. 

“Yeah,” Joe says. “I just needed to talk to my parents.”

And because John still has a worried look on his face, Joe leans over and gently pecks him on the lips. 

“It’s okay, baby,” Joe says reassuringly, smiling when John blushes at the pet name. “Everything’s gonna be okay.”

*****

They manage to get a GP appointment the following afternoon and, as expected, the doctor looks at Joe as though he’s crazy.

He doesn’t say it, but Joe can tell he’s thinking it. 

Joe can tell John is thinking it too.

It’s the first time that Joe has said any of this in front of John. He had wondered whether he should tell John about all this before seeing the doctor, but he’d chickened out in the end. 

In hindsight, he probably _should_ have told John about all this beforehand. He probably should have told John that he’s from another universe where’s he a lot less successful and married to a much older version of John. But he knows how it sounds. And he wanted to avoid having John look at him the way he’s looking at him now for as long as possible. 

The doctor examines Joe for head trauma and takes a blood test to see if there’s anything in his system. But Joe knows the guy is probably making a mental note to refer him to a psychiatrist. 

He’s told that he’ll receive the results of the blood tests in a few days, and in the meantime he should get plenty of rest and sleep. The whole visit only frustrates Joe more, not least because it hasn’t given him any clear answers. 

There’s also the issue that John now seems to be suitably pissed off that Joe has been keeping this from him. And Joe doesn’t blame him.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” John whispers when they’re on their way home. “Why didn’t you tell me you were going through this?”

Joe sighs. “Because I knew you’d think I was crazy.”

“I’m your husband, Joe. You’re supposed to be able to tell me these things. If you’re sick or something’s not right...I want you to tell me about it. I thought you’d trust me enough to talk to me about all this.”

“I do trust you,” Joe says softly. “But I’m scared, John. I don’t know what’s happened to me, and I’m so confused. I didn’t know how to explain this to you.”

John remains silent for the rest of the drive, and Joe has no idea what to say to reassure him. After all, now that John is aware of all this, he must know that Joe doesn’t see him as his real husband. Even if John just thinks that Joe is crazy or delusional, he must realise that Joe doesn’t think of him as the man he loves. 

Joe doesn’t know what to do. 

He’s no closer to finding answers, and now he’s pushed away his husband. 

*****

Over the next few days, John is noticeably less affectionate. 

He seems to avoid Joe when he can, and when they’re together at mealtimes or in bed, he’s a lot more withdrawn and reserved.

Joe misses it. The atmosphere between them is tense. Uncomfortable. Even though he knows this isn’t _his_ husband, he misses that familiar affection, the one source of comfort in this unfamiliar world.

He feels as though he needs that comfort more than ever when the doctor calls with his blood test results.

Everything is normal.

They couldn’t find anything wrong. There is no medical explanation as to what happened to Joe. 

“It’s a good thing, I suppose,” John says quietly, perching on the arm of the sofa. “You’re healthy. There’s nothing wrong with you.”

A moment of heavy silence. 

Joe wonders if John really does think it’s a good thing. After all, that means the only other possibilities are that John’s husband isn’t right in the head, or his husband isn’t _his_ husband. 

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you,” Joe says quietly. “You really must think I’m crazy now.”

“I wouldn’t have thought you were crazy if you’d told me this from the beginning.” John swallows. “Because I trusted you.”

Joe blinks. “You don’t trust me now?”

John turns away, blinking back tears. “I don’t know who you are anymore. You won’t let me in.”

Joe sighs. “Look, I’m sorry, John. I don’t know what’s going on here, but I’m scared. This is not my home and you are not my husband.”

John looks as though he’s been punched. 

_You are not my husband._

“Shit, no,” Joe says quickly. “What I meant was, I’m married to a different John, _he’s_ my husband-“

But it’s too late.

John is wiping away tears as he grabs his jacket and heads for the door.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Joe needs to talk to John...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The penultimate chapter whooooo! It’s smut time, baby.

After John leaves, Joe doesn’t really know what to do with himself. 

He feels completely and utterly alone. 

No one believes him. No one understands. No one can help him. 

He sits in the living room and stares at the photos on every wall and surface, depicting a life he doesn’t remember. A life he knows nothing about. 

Joe looks at the photos of himself in various intimate embraces with John; the photos of him and John holding hands at movie premieres and in various exotic locations, and it seems almost too perfect. There’s a photo on the table next to him where it looks as though they’re backstage at a Queen concert; John has his bass on, and is laughing at the camera as Joe kisses his cheek, one arm wrapped around his husband. 

It looks like a moment Joe would have once fantasised about, but right now it just makes him long for home. It makes him long for his quiet life with his much older husband, and the quirky independent film projects that he’s always loved so much.

He’s not sure how long he sits there feeling miserable, but it must be a good hour or so. 

He’s jolted from his thoughts by the doorbell ringing, and at first he assumes it must be John, who perhaps forgot his keys. Joe wonders if they’re about to get into another argument, and he steels himself for it as he gets up to answer the door. 

He’s surprised therefore to find Freddie standing outside.

Joe still finds himself starstruck even though he knows this can’t be real, that this man standing in front of him is dead. 

Freddie simply raises an eyebrow. “Time-travel, eh?”

Joe blinks. 

“Don’t look so shocked, darling. I’ve heard more preposterous things in my life.”

Joe swallows. “He told you? Where is he? Is he okay?”

“John is fine, darling,” Freddie says with a dismissive wave, inviting himself in. “I was just over at Roger’s and he turned up in tears. He’s still there now, but I thought I’d drop by and check in on you on my way home.”

“I didn’t mean to upset him,” Joe says quietly, watching as Freddie wanders to the kitchen and starts making himself at home, searching for the coffee. “God, I’ve been going through some weird shit these last few days and I didn’t know what to do. I knew he’d think I was crazy if I told him.”

“Well look, I have no idea if you actually _are_ a time traveller from another universe,” Freddie grins, winking at Joe, “but it’s not that that’s upset him. It’s the fact that you never said a word about this to him. But I do understand why you kept quiet about it. I would’ve been afraid of people thinking me crazy too.” 

There isn’t even a hint of sarcasm or teasing in his voice.

Joe frowns. “Wait a minute. Are you saying you believe me?”

Freddie shrugs. “Why would you lie? Why would you make something like this up? I’ve known you for a long time, Joe, and I know you have an odd sense of humour but you wouldn’t make something like this up.”

Joe laughs bitterly. “Can you say that to John please?”

“I already have.” Freddie smiles. “Look, I don’t know what the hell is going on here. It all sounds rather absurd, but I know you’re not deliberately making stuff up, or at least you’re not doing this to hurt John. And you may not see my John as _your_ John, but if you have any love for him at all, then please just show him that love. Until you can figure this out, please just be good to him and take care of him.”

Joe would never even have considered doing otherwise. 

“Of course,” Joe says firmly. 

“So tell me about this other life you have in the future.” Freddie nudges Joe. “Are you and I still the life of the party, downing shots together in bars and making prats of ourselves?”

Joe’s heart sinks. “Not exactly. But I don’t wanna say too much. Don’t wanna give away any spoilers.”

He does tell Freddie a bit about his life though. He tells him that John is happy and he tells him that he starred in a film about Queen. He deliberately leaves out any details related to Freddie’s fate though. 

They laugh and talk some more, and Joe has to constantly pinch himself metaphorically to remind himself that he’s talking to Freddie Mercury. The hours seem to fly by, until Roger turns up at the front door with John. 

“I believe this belongs to you,” Roger says with a smile, giving John a gentle push in Joe’s direction. 

Joe gives his husband a tentative smile, relieved to see him. “Hi.”

John thankfully gives a small smile back. “Hello.”

Freddie stands and wraps an arm around Roger’s shoulders. “Let’s make a move then, darling. Leave the lovebirds to talk.”

The men disappear after Freddie gives Joe a wink, and the first thing Joe does is give John a hug. 

“I’m sorry,” Joe whispers. “I didn’t mean what I said. I’m really sorry.”

He squeezes John gently, inhaling the scent that’s so familiar and yet so different to his real husband’s. 

After Freddie and Roger have left, Joe makes them both a cup of tea, and they settle down in the living room with the volume on the TV turned down low. 

“I’m so sorry,” Joe says again. “I said something awful and I didn’t mean it. I’ve just been feeling so confused and frightened these last few days.”

John offers a tentative smile. “I’m sorry too. I got a bit overwhelmed and I haven’t really tried to talk to you about all this. I should have been more supportive. So...let’s talk.”

Joe raises an eyebrow. “You wanna talk about it?”

“Yes. Freddie said I should have an open mind and try and be more understanding. So let’s talk about it. I want to know more about the future, or this other world, or wherever it is you’re supposed to come from.”

Joe chuckles quietly. “Okay. What would you like to know?”

John looks thoughtful. “Tell me more about us? You said at the doctors that we’re married, but you’re the same age you are now and I’m older?”

“That’s right. Where I’m from, I was born in 1983. You were still born in 1951.”

“That’s an awfully big age gap,” John says. “You could be my son.”

“It is a bit of an age gap, yeah.” Joe shrugs. “But we love each other.”

“How did we meet?”

“Funny story, actually. I played you in a film.”

“You played me? As in, there’s a film about me?”

“Yeah. It’s a film about Queen. I played you and you came to the set one day, and then we started hanging out and we got closer...and the rest is history.”

“That’s pretty cool actually,” John says with a smile. “Am I still pretty when I’m old?” His tone is slightly playful. 

“You’re beautiful,” Joe says, completely serious. “So beautiful.”

Joe tells John all about their life together; the trips they’ve been on, the house they’ve renovated, their quiet existence in the suburbs. Thankfully John doesn’t ask too many questions about his fellow bandmates, and Joe is able to avoid talking about Freddie. 

“It sounds like a wonderful life,” John says softly. “No wonder you’re so desperate to get back to it.”

Joe reaches out to take John’s hand. “Desperate to get back to _you_. Not _away_ from you.”

John smiles, but there’s sadness in his eyes. “Well, I hope you do get back to him...to me.”

Joe suddenly feels a wave of affection rush over him for this John, and he reaches out to cup his face. 

“I hope your Joe gets back to you too. I know he loves you more than anything.”

And then he leans forward and kisses John. 

It’s soft at first, just a brush of the lips, but then John has tears on his face and he’s deepening the kiss, wrapping his arms around Joe’s neck. He tastes just like the man Joe has kissed so many times, sweet and smoky.

“Don’t ever doubt how much he loves you,” Joe says softly. “How much _I _love you.”__

__And then they’re kissing more hungrily, as if they’re both worried that they’ll never see their husbands again and all they have for comfort is each other. John climbs into Joe’s lap, and Joe feels as though the lines between reality and whatever this is are blurring dangerously, but he can’t bring himself not to touch John._ _

__Instead he pulls John in by his ass and kisses him thoroughly, pouring out the love he feels for his John and every John in every universe._ _

__John’s fingers are soon fumbling with Joe’s belt before pulling his t-shirt over his head, and Joe decides not to think about this too much as they start undressing each other._ _

__Joe is impossibly hard by the time they’re both naked, and he’s trembling slightly as John climbs back into his lap, their cocks brushing together._ _

__“Take me,” John whispers in Joe’s ear softly. “Please.”_ _

__All Joe can hear is the voice of his husband, his real husband, begging him to make love to him._ _

__Apparently they keep condoms and lube in the kitchen as a precautionary measure, and Joe can’t help but smile at John’s eagerness as he rushes off to grab them._ _

__“We have so many shags in the kitchen that we thought it might be a good idea to keep some supplies there,” John laughs breathlessly, settling in Joe’s lap again._ _

__Joe coats his fingers generously in lube before circling John’s entrance gently, watching the younger man’s face carefully for any sign of discomfort before slipping a finger inside him._ _

__John makes exactly the same noises that Joe is used to from his older counterpart when he fingers him, and for a moment, it really does feel as though Joe is back at home._ _

__While Joe is fingering, John is stroking Joe’s dick, and they kiss slowly as they work. It’s the intimacy that Joe has craved for so long, and he realises that even if he’s trapped in this life forever, it’s really not a bad life to be trapped in._ _

__John is clearly impatient; he’s already reaching for the condom while Joe has two fingers inside him._ _

__“Take it easy,” Joe laughs, gently nudging a third finger inside his husband. “I’m not going anywhere.”_ _

__John lets out a small moan, and he pauses for a few seconds, eyes fluttering closed, but then he’s reaching for Joe’s cock again. He rolls the condom down over Joe’s erection, before grabbing the lube and applying it generously._ _

__Up until this point, Joe had been assuming that John would ride him right here on the sofa, so he’s a little surprised when John stands and holds out his hand._ _

__“I want you to fuck me up against the wall,” John says in response to Joe’s inquisitive look, and _fuck_ , who could argue with _that_?_ _

__He scrambles to stand and follow John to the nearest wall, and when John presses his back against the wall and pulls him into a kiss, Joe knows he isn’t going to last long. Joe grabs the backs of John’s thighs and _lifts_ , grinning against the younger man’s lips when John locks his legs around Joe’s waist._ _

__Joe has never had sex with _his_ John in this position before._ _

__It takes a couple of clumsy attempts to enter John, and they both laugh warmly, but once he’s inside Joe just forgets everything else._ _

__If he closes his eyes, he really can’t tell the difference. This is his John. The taste of him, the smell of him, the feeling of being inside him-_ _

__Joe starts to thrust, gentle at first to give John time to get used to it, and it isn’t long before John is clawing at his back._ _

__“Faster, Joe,” John begs. “More.”_ _

__Joe does as requested, increasing the speed of his thrusts and grinning as John lets out the most needy moans. Moans that are all too familiar._ _

__Joe is covered in sweat and his arms are burning from the effort of holding John up, but he can’t stop now. There’s no way he could stop now. He fucks John for all he’s worth, letting out an animalistic growl as John tightens his legs around Joe’s hips, and then John is screaming his name-_ _

__Joe feels the warm stickiness of John’s release on his stomach, and he keeps his eyes on John as he gives a few more deep thrusts and comes himself._ _

__They stay in position for a moment as they calm down, endorphins running through their brains, and Joe only places John carefully on the floor when he can’t hold him up any longer._ _

__“Whoa,” Joe says with a breathless laugh._ _

__“Yeah,” John giggles, leaning in for another kiss._ _

__When they crawl into bed after they’ve cleaned up, fucked out and exhausted, Joe wonders if maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to be stuck here._ _

__But then he thinks of his John back home, and he immediately feels a pang of guilt._ _

__There’s movement beside him, and John shifts so that he rests his head on Joe’s chest, wrapping an arm around him tightly._ _

__“You’ll get him back soon,” John says softly. “I’m sure you will.”_ _

__Joe smiles and presses a kiss to John’s curls, squeezing him gently. “I would love you in any universe, you know that right?”_ _

__John laughs. “Well, I have no idea how many different crazy universes there are out there, but I feel the same. You’ll always be my Joe, wherever you’re from.”_ _

__They share another gentle kiss, and John’s words are swirling around in Joe’s brain as he drifts off to sleep._ _


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The morning after...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for the delay- life has been hectic lately! Thanks so much to everyone who’s read this to the end and left lovely comments :) I hope you’ve enjoyed it!

When Joe wakes up the next morning, something feels different.

He can’t quite put his finger on it. 

He knows that something changed between him and John yesterday; the sex caused a shift in their relationship- it brought them to an understanding. They both made their peace with the fact that Joe might be stuck in this world, and that they might never get their husbands back. 

Joe isn’t quite sure how to feel as he blinks his eyes open. He’s glad that him and John seem to be on the same page now, and that they both have some kind of a shared understanding about what’s going on, even if it is completely bizarre. But at the same time it makes him sad to think that this John may never get his Joe back. It’s as if Joe is depriving this John of the man he really loves-

He’s so lost in his thoughts that it takes him a moment to realise he’s in a different room to the one he fell asleep in.

Well it _is_ the same room, but the decor is different. Different but familiar. 

Joe’s heart is pounding with excitement as he turns to look at the man sleeping next to him. 

No perm. No youthful face.

Just thinning grey hair and the ageing face of the man Joe loves. 

Joe reaches out with a trembling hand to stroke John’s jaw, wondering if once again he’s dreaming. There’s a small part of him that feels sad- sad to lose the younger version of this man who he’s just started to grow close to, but that only lasts a moment until John stirs and wakes up.

The minute their eyes meet, Joe knows he’s home. 

“Oh my god,” Joe whispers, and then he pulls his husband in for a kiss.

John lets out a surprised grunt as Joe presses their lips together, but he soon kisses back, and Joe lets out a happy sigh. It feels so good to feel John’s morning stubble against his jaw and to taste him again. 

“It’s good to be home,” Joe says softly. 

John looks at for him at a moment, as if he’s trying to work something out. He reaches forward and strokes Joe’s jaw, studying him carefully. 

“It’s you,” John says. “My Joe.”

That strikes Joe as a very odd thing for his husband to say, and then realisation hits him-

“Wait,” Joe says quickly, “ _what_? Did some weird shit happen to you too? Who went to bed with you last night?”

“It was you,” John says softly, “but _not_ you.”

And that’s when Joe understands. 

He tells John everything. He tells him about young John, and meeting Freddie, and feeling like he was going crazy. John doesn’t look at him like he’s crazy though. 

Because John’s been through something similar.

At first Joe can’t help but feel a little jealous, to know that John has been holding another Joe these last few days. But he understands; he knows John has felt the same confusion and worry and pain that Joe has felt. And Joe knows John must feel the same way about him sleeping with young John.

Neither of them has any idea how this happened or why, but they’re both just happy to be back with each other. 

“I’m scared I’ll lose you again,” John admits quietly. 

Joe blinks back tears as he shuffles into John’s arms, kissing his jaw. “I’m scared of losing you too. I don’t know what the hell happened but I really hope it doesn’t happen again.”

They cuddle in silence for a few minutes, and then John says something that breaks Joe’s heart a little. 

“Did you prefer him?” John asks quietly against Joe’s hair.

Joe looks him in the eye. “What are you talking about?”

“Young me.” John chuckles sadly. “It must be a disappointment to wake up next to me after spending time with a younger, more handsome version of me. Someone closer to your own age.”

“Don’t be stupid,” Joe says immediately, peppering his husband’s face with kisses. “Young you was hot, but you know I love an older man. Besides, you’re the man with all the wisdom. You’ve been shaped by your experiences and by your time with me, and that’s what I love.”

John’s smile softens. “I’m glad you think so. I love you so much, sweetheart. I’m so glad to have you back.”

They kiss, and Joe knows without a doubt that this is the John he was meant to be with. He would love John in any universe, but this is _his_ John. 

John pins Joe to the mattress, kissing him thoroughly. 

There’s no place like home.


End file.
